This topic of friendship is such an important one to think about – because when you enjoy greater friendships – you truly enjoy a happier life. Friends should bring you joy, love and laughter – not stress, drama and anxiety.
Here are 20 ways to avoid toxic friends and enjoy true friendships!
1. Surround yourself with cheerleaders – not fear leaders! True friends motivate and support you – and let you know they believe in you.
2. Love those who will love you when you have nothing to offer but your own company.
3. Appreciate those who are happy for your happiness and sad for your sadness. These are people to truly treasure.
4. Value those who are there for you – no matter what! True friends have been with you through the worst – and still think you’re the best! If you want to find out who your true friends are, screw up – then see who’s still around!
5. True friends “get you” at a soul level – then make your soul feel happily caffeinated.
6. True friends make you feel safe to think out loud in front of them.
7. Value friends who speak truthfully to you – and are up for engaging in “courageous dialogues” about what’s on their mind and in their heart. There’s a famous expression: “A friend is someone who stabs in the front.” In other words: Honesty is better than sugar-coated bullshit.
8. Words are who someone wants to be. Actions are who they truly are.
9. Everything in this universe is energy. Trust the energy you feel around a person. This energy lets you know a lot of information about them. Listen up!
10. Together, your assorted friends should be varied and well-rounded – with an emphasis on quality not quantity. You don’t need a certain amount of friends. You just need friends you can be certain about.
11. Keep in mind Jim Rohn’s belief that eventually you become the merging of the 5 people you spend the most time hanging out with! Choose your top 5 friends wisely.
12. You cannot change the people around you – but you can change the people you choose to be around!
13. Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Truly good friends listen to what you don’t say.
14. Keep in mind that none of us are perfect. We all make mistakes. What’s essential is surrounding yourself with people who value learning and growing. As John Green said: “I don’t know any perfect people. Just really, really flawed people who are still worth loving.”
15. While it’s good to give people who mess up a chance to make things right, remember it should be more like 3 strikes and you’re out – not 3,687,201 strikes and you’re out! At a certain point it’s essential/self-loving to move on. You gotta ignore people who do crappy things to you. And you gotta forget about people who have forgotten about you. Basically, stop stressing about people who don’t deserve room in your heart! Do what you can to let go and forgive them. All of your them’s. The more them’s you can forgive, the better you’ll feel! And yes – it’s very possible and very okay to forgive someone and still not want to spend time with them.
16. No friendship or relationship is ever a waste of time. If it doesn’t give you what you want – it reminds you what you don’t want.
17. Do no harm. But take no sh*t.
18. Kind people are the best kinda people. Seek kind people. Be kind people. Become aware of how you make people feel when they’re around you. Focus on bringing people peace, love, support and inspiration.
19. Let the friends you love know it. Say it in your own way – but say it. You’ll brighten their day and grow how close you feel. Life is short. Love largely.
20. Keep in mind the words of Daniel Franzese : “You either like me or you don’t. It took me 20-something years to learn how to love myself. I don’t have that kinda time to convince someone else.”